Psychological Review: Negative Effects of Being an Only Child

Parents can devote themselves to their children. Also, children represent the future of a country. Environment and education will have an impact on children’s personalities and characteristic. Numerous children because of lack of love in their childhood develop distorted personality. In China, in order to decrease the large amount of population, the government implemented one-child policy for over 30 years. Therefore, most families in China only have one child. Negative effects of being an only child is that it makes the child overloaded, dependent and asocial.

The Overloaded Only Child

Childhood should be relaxed, so making children overloaded is bad. When there are several children in a family, the characteristic of each child is obvious. As a result, parents can objectively encourage their children to develop differently. On the contrary, when a family has an only child, parents always want this child to be the “best”. Also, parents like to compare their own child with other family’s child or successful person. Therefore, every only child takes plenty of classes such as piano or math, which makes that child extra busy. Parents always think their child is the best and also hope their child can show how good he is. The only way to show is getting a high grade. For example, when I was in primary school, I took Olympics math course. Olympics math is really hard, even for the college student. I had to study it hard for entering a good middle school. Meanwhile, I had to study my regular class. However, it is very common that a child is good at studying but sports or arts, though parents always think their child is playing when he is playing basketball or drawing a picture. In fact, both a profession basketball player or an artist and a scientist are successful. Children learn when they are entertained, so it is easier for a child who is not interested in studying work on what he likes to do. The experience of childhood is vital. It will influent children’s ethical value and future.

The Dependent Only Child

In addition, an only child is easier to depend on other people. Because of having only one child, parents can have more time to educate their child and parental control may be too much. For example, a ten-year-old child always asks his mother,“my homework is done, what should I do next?” He has already lost independence. Parents was a keeper that keeps children safe, follow the rules and correct the ethic, but now, parents becomes controllers that control child’s interests and talent. In this way, it might be fine if the child becomes success. However, if the child is fail, it will be difficult to accomplish anything because he depends on his parents too much. Homework is written for parents; exam is taken for parents; job is gotten by parents; house is bought by parents. In this case, the only child does not even feel grateful.

Only child knows that parents did something good for him, but he is not be thankful. For example, I have a friend who has married. Both she and her husband has nice job and loves each other although they still have a big issue. Her husband goes her parents’ home every day and he calls her mom every time after work. What’s more, a decision that concerns her and her husband, her husband will ask him mother’s opinion. My friend was mad at her husband that relies on her mother too much, so she wanted to talk to her husband. Then, she knew that her husband is an only child, meanwhile, his mother helped him makes decision since he is young. Accordingly, if people liked to depend on their parents and their parents did not correct them, this bad habit will accompany with them no matter how elder they will be.

The Asocial Only Child

Most only child is asocial. Most people think they are not willing to communicate with their same generations. In fact, most only child desire to have friends with their same generations. Unfortunately, there are few chances that they can play together because they are busy. Once there is a chance that they can play together, their parents might ask their child to be back because they cannot be sure if other child affects their own “best” child. Even though an only child can play with other only child, their parents will be with them usually. As a result, only child cannot learn how to get along with their same generations because parents will always disturb their friendship. Because only child has more time that gets along with parents instead of their same generations, only child is more likely to be asocial. On the other hand, traditional Chinese culturesays regard friends as brothers. If an only child is not educated correctly, when he contacts personal loyalty, he might trust people easily before he judges these people is good or bad. The relationship of people is important but no connection with high grade. Also, there is no school that is able to teach how to get along with people.

China is the only country who has the only child policy, which means that this specific situation only happens in China. Although it does decrease the large amount of population, it is also should be realized that being an only child can be overloaded, independent and asocial. There are many ways that solve the population issue. Chinese government should come up with some better ideas instead of only child policy so that children will not suffered any bad experiences. Other countries that have population issue should not implement only child policy as well.

The Specialness Manifest

A child who is born and raised up to experience that it is excessively special will not have a sensible sense of itself. This is for the reason that what is being replicated back to them, from their father and mother is idealized. Every one of parent’s desire to see their child in the finest likely light but this can imply they are reluctant to see any mistakes and can fill their child with hope of being just right. This is tricky since if the child realizes that he or she is not ideal it result to a sense of insufficiency; or if they consider the parental point of view, it can result to a sense of showiness – that is having an experience of self that is much superior or grander than the truth and thus out of reach. Even as it is significant for each child to experience that unique and exclusive feeling, if specialness is united with a shortage of sibling similarity, the child will be incapable to build up a good judgment of who they are in connection to others. It is significant for a child to be capable to measure up to its own behavior in connection to another kid, if at all possible in a similar family, to facilitate a sense of balance. Another trouble with being exceptional is that it time and again implies the child carry the cheerfulness of another, and in that way you become accountable for that cheerfulness. If that is the happiness of a mother or father, it makes it hard to break the bonds and disconnect psychologically. Children who get that special treatment at the end they turn out to be spoilt kids. They become irresponsible and may turn out to be a big problem to the parents and the society.